I never said my garden wasn't magical...

How did it get to this?  Let's recap. 

Rented one of those big, WHITE* windowless vans to impress woman.

*white

My Toronto is taking pictures while driving through intermittently bad traffic.

All together now: "My Toronto is CTV News!"

Wanted to buy an Iphone so I could do this with it.

Riddle me this Batman anybody with a grade school education.

I am willing to sign a 3 year contract with Rogers to get an Iphone.

I can't because I do not qualify for a hardware upgrade.

I've been with them for 4 months on a month by month plan.

I do not qualify until April of next year.

They suggest I move to Fido then move back to Rogers.

I strangle one of them to death.

Riddle. Me. That.

So as with the many times prior I've been

 disappointed with this Rogers

store I walk to the neighboring Canadian Tire.

Where....

Rotate it yourself!!!

So excited I run up the escalator.  

Oh, yeah.  One of those side escalators. 

 Don't act like you're not impressed.

What kind of loser/moron/jerk/sociopath

 would buy dying plants because they are on sale?

As flattering as it is to be called a sociopath I HAVE A NAME.

I am...

SASHA FIERCE!